Then

Now
Indy Star - A 37-year-old Arizona man filed a police complaint against a flight attendant who tapped him on the knee with a magazine to wake him up. Kevin Johnson told Indianapolis Airport police he was sleeping in the back row of a chartered Million Air flight that arrived at 8:53 a.m. Sunday when the incident happened. Johnson said as he slept  he was “rudely interrupted” by a flight attendant, according to a police report. Johnson said the attendant struck him on his knee with a magazine but he could not identify which attendant it was. Officer Ricky Seconds wrote that Johnson “had no physical signs of injury, no complaint of pain and no paralysis from the magazine.”

Oh man.  Nothing worse than getting woken up on the plane mid flight.  Total trip ruiner.   Like when I was coming home from Europe on a 9 hour flight and got 2 Ambien deep then was immediately woken up 15 minutes in by some cuntbag checking my seat belt.  Spent the next 8:45 straight up hallucinating wishing we’d just crash and I could die.  I mean I hate frivolous lawsuits and people who go around suing everybody and filing charges on everybody as much as the next guy.   However the only thing I hate worse is flight attendants so I think Kevin Johnson will find himself pleasantly surprised that I’m on his side here.  I mean it’s not so much the actual act of assault here that I’m on board with but just the overall spiteful attitude.  Anything to bring these assholes to their knees.    Like is there anybody who places more importance on their meaningless job than flight attendants?  The bouncers of the sky.  Hey newsflash dickwads.   You’re no great authority.  You provide literally nothing to me except bringing me drinks and pretzels.  That’s it.  Nobody watched your stupid safety instructional shit.  Put my TV volume back on.  If the plane crashes you’re going to die.  I’m going to die.   You’re not going to do shit to help me.  Just sit in your fold out seat and let me sleep on this $400 flight in peace.  Also do me a favor and go back to being hot sluts in short skirts instead of gay guys and 65 year olds with chips on their shoulders.

PS-  Million Air is like a private jet right?  What the fuck was a flight attendant doing waking up a rich guy on a private jet?   Know your role honey.
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